Only MENSA alumni can proceed



Are you kidding? Is that even English? Jeezus!

Say what?

"The Macintosh uses an experimental pointing device called a 'mouse'. There is no evidence that people want to use these things." - John C. Dvorak (1984)

God of Small Things

A Q&A with Craig Venter - the first man to publish the complete multi-billion word genome sequence of a human being, himself.

Scientists believe that in a few years, people would be able to procure their own gene codes for as little as $10,000. How far are we from questioning divinity? Redefining humanity? Scary, terrifying, revolutionary but true.

Melody makes a comeback

If the Van Gogh wasn't sufficient enough of a clue, today one is reviewing Aamir Khan's directorial venture, Taare Zameen Par, with music by the trio, Shankar-Ehsaan-Loy.

No doubt, its a "No B.S." album. None of the gimmickry that is usually associated with a Bollywood album. This one is straight-up good, multi-genre music, served fresh. And its the return of classic S-E-L music. And mind you, not the Jhoom-Barabar S-E-L or even the Bunty Aur Babli S-E-L.

This is the stuff that belongs on the shelf with albums like Dil Chahta Hai and Rockford (Remember "Aasmaan ke paar shaayad aur koi aasmaan hoga" ?). And even Iqbal.

The title track, Taare Zameen Par which you see in the promos, is dreamy. Brilliantly rendered by Shankar, its somehow reminiscent of the "verse" of Roja's title track, with delicate instrumentation and tinkles. To contrast this tangentially, comes the second track, Kholo Kholo, which has a rock/blues feel. Very Parikrama meets Lucky Ali. Both these songs set the pace for what is truly a roller coaster of a soundtrack.

My favorite track in the set - Shankar's rendition of the uncomplicated ballad, Maa. Historically, Bollywood has given us very few "Mother's Day" songs, where we get to laud that one special lady in our lives. One of my favorites used to be a song in Sagarika's private album, but it was still missing a significant element.

This song fills that long-standing void. Sadly, the lyrics of the verse aren't generic enough that everyone can relate to it, as they are rather specific to situations in the movie. However, the overall song is heart-rendered, and strikes a perfect resonance with the listener.

Its been forever since I've heard a light ballad that could carry a ton of emotions. Brilliant stuff.

Main kabhi batlaata nahin,
Par andhere se darta hoon main, maa
Yun to main, dikhlaata nahin,
Teri parwaah karta hoon main, maa

Tujhe sab hai pataa, hai na, maa?
Tujhe sab hai pataa, meri maa

Simple words. You only have to be able to portray your flow of thought and emotion, lucidly, and in a way that's pleasing to the ear, in order to be a good lyricist. The simplicity of the lyrics of this song go to prove that one does not have to be purposefully obfuscatory and complex and distorted in order to win the hearts of your audience. Are you listening, Gulzar Sahab?

Why take panga, yaar?



Poll of the Day, IndiaFM, 11/05

T - 4 days

Switched at birth?

Orlando Bloom and Justin Timberlake.

Hmmm.

Jab We Met

Thought that struck me, post-writing the review - wish this film had been the comeback vehicle of Kajol, with Aamir Khan, instead of Fanaa. Kajol would have fit the bill of the talkative Geet, perfectly, and Aamir would've done the brooding role of Aditya, to a T.

Its about time!



When I first heard it, I knew that this song had all the requisites of being a phenomenal acoustic track. This version just brings it all together - the melody, the feel - minus Rihanna's nasality. Would love to hear Moore's take on Unfaithful.

In other news, seems that Junoon's shortlisted for the Nobel Peace Prize concert in December in Oslo, along with the likes of Alicia Keys, Annie Lennox, KT Tunstall and Earth, Wind & Fire. Wow!

Intricately Mature...

Agree with the Xinugeist (a.k.a. India's female answer to Roger Ebert) on this one. Jab We Met was substantially beyond expectations. Under the overall guise of a typical Bollywood DDLJ-type movie, this "It-Happened-One-Night"-esque caper transitioned away from many stereotypes, supported by capable performances by Shahid and Kareena.

With an interesting "teacher-becomes-student" formula (My Fair Lady, Black), the film did turn out to be rather "with it", emerging to be quite mature and "today", successfully bridging the constant timegap between Indian society and its Bollywood on-screen interpretation. Snappy screenplay, simple yet cute dialogues and a catchy music score by Pritam, with songs that don't digress from the movie track. Shahid's moves are awesome. Kareena starts off suicidally annoying, gets progressively bearable rather quickly in her first 10 minutes on-screen itself, and settles into a truly adorable character.

Cons? Ultra disappointing supporting cast. Kareena's sister and her almost-husband (you'll understand when you see it) are awful! Almost felt as if they were sluggishly cast to throw more emphasis on the main two protagonists. Second half does tend to drag a tad bit (especially with the whole "waiting-to-tell-Mom/Dad-the-truth" bit).

It does have its unbelievabilities. And its "oh-c'mon" moments. But that's Bollywood. I think we've all come to differentiate Bollywood and its trademark elements and idiosyncracies, from all other forms of foreign cinema. Its nice to see movies like this that keep those elements intact, and yet highlight their own degree of uniqueness.

Last word? A breath of fresh air.

In terms of the soundtrack, I think I've been more than vocal about my thoughts on "Aaoge Jab Tum" in an earlier post. "Mauja" is the quintessential peppy punjabi number. "Yeh Ishq Haye" is aight.

But my true favorite on this OST, is quite the underdog - the first song in the movie, "Aao Milo Chalo" featuring Shaan and Ustad Sultan "Piya Basanti Re" Khan (finally being utilized exactly and optimally how his paan/tobacco-coated phlegmatic vocals ought to be - i.e. in the background! God, don't let me get started on 'Ustad and the Divas'!)

But this track is really fresh, well-sung and quite reminiscent of a lot of Shaan's traveler-type songs from Tanha Dil. And quite like the movie - its appeal is in its simplicity.

OSO!

The look of this movie reminds me so much of the Instant Karma "Saamne Yeh Kaun Aaya" video.

Listened to this entire soundtrack, end-to-end, and have got to admit - this flick's got the makings of the big hit that '07 has been waiting for. A sizzling stunning newcomer, a revamped and worked-out superstar, a killer complete musical score, oodles of anticipation - and hype-generation tactics that dreams are made of. Its the whole enchilada.

Granted - its not going to be legendary, classic cinema. But it seems geared for blockbuster success - an enthusiastic theme (a fun look at 70's Bollywood), clean 'n' crisp entertainment, a well-cut comedy track, glitzy stars, a lot of hoopla, colorful visuals and sets, peppered with Bollywood masala a la Farah. Looking forward to this one!

ListAway (Updated)

Here's a list to close for the weekend on.

Movies that will never get old, which one can watch, again and again and again.

1. Notting Hill
2. The Girl Next Door
3. Andaz Apna Apna
4. Hot Shots (both)/the Naked Gun series
5. When Harry Met Sally + Sleepless in Seattle
6. Every Austin Powers movie
7. Oceans Eleven (and only Eleven)
8. Mission Impossible (and only the first one)
9. The Godfather / Scarface
10. Fools Rush In
11. Harold and Kumar go to White Castle

Folks?

Clarice...

Talking of chilling themes, the main theme of Silence of the Lambs.

It drips with the allegory of fear.

Its blue

H2-Whoa!

The BMW Hydrogen 7



Nice! I love the closing line - "ready for the world, when the world is ready". European-based ads always have crisper graphics and slicker voice-overs.

In other news, am currently consuming the music of "Dus Kahaaniyan". Will revert with review, shortly.

And remember, there is no such thing as the theory of evolution. Only a list of animals that Chuck Norris allows to live.

As beautiful as it is melancholy

Neither is it a movie that lauds the underdog, nor is it a rags-to-riches tale. Man Push Cart is the unresolved, bittertrue story of a man trying to make a living, pushing a coffee/bagel cart, on the streets of New York City.

For those who haven't caught them first-hand, let me tell you that these carts are a veritable sub-economy that survive below-the-line, on tiny profit margins, predominantly eaten into by leasing agents and taxes. The guys who run the vendy are usually Indian/Pakistani/Middle Eastern, and in most cases, pleasant and chirpy with curious greetings that put a smile on your face, regardless of the struggle that they face commuting from the bronx or brooklyn every morning, in order to get their carts on to their pre-prescribed locations before the morning rush-hour begins. My usual guy has a brilliant memory for regular customers and their orders, a way with words that is sure to brighten everyone's day along with their morning coffee, and speed and efficiency better than a six-sigma certified supply chain system. Everyone who works in the city has their favorite coffee vendy.

MPC talks about one such guy, and his cart, and effortlessly outlines his struggle and life to create a moving and non-Moral-Science-ish experience. The unexplored twist lies in the fact that he is actually a rock star back in Pakistan, whose career didn't quite sustain at its peak, post which he came to America for the woman he loved. What I liked is that the intricacies of how he ended up working a cart, are never outlined - thereby avoiding all unnecessary plot diversions. As Ebert put it best, "free from contrived melodrama and phony suspense". The film cracked an 86% on Rotten Tomatoes - the only movie site I have come to trust these days.

The camera is an off-center spectator in this film. It doesn't sparkle with any technical brilliance, nor does it require to. It doesn't even boast of a brilliant screenplay or script, being neo-realistic in its approach.

Ahmad Rizvi is sublime and underplayed - just what his character demands - his sincere expression makes him lovable, and very easy to empathize with. The plot (or lack thereof) is fluid, and has one captured with rapt attention as they traverse his life.

If you plan to watch only 1 indie flick before the year goes out, let this be it.

Mad Thematics!

Creating a musical theme within a film which is lilting, haunting and memorable, and using it carefully, tastefully and usefully, across your movie is a true and rare art form.

Just realized that the opening instrumental notes of "Main Agar Kahoon" are the same as the piece that Richa Sharma sings to open "Jag Soona Soona Laage" (i.e. the "dil jude bina hi" sequence)

Of course, once you've listened to the Om Shanti Om soundtrack as much as I have, several of these aspects tend to stand out and stare at you. Like if you listen to Dard-E-Disco backwards, you hear the strain, "Shah Rukh's six packs are stick-ons". But maybe that's all the grass.

Background themes with adequate sustaining power in recent years:

(1) The "Ya Maula" sequence in Fanaa: Full marks to Salim-Suleiman for this one.
(2) The "Saathiya" harmony piece by Sonu, in Saathiya. Although, I much prefer its southie counterpart, "Sakhiya Cheliya" by Clinton.
(3) "Ganga, kaahe tu jaaye pardes, chod ke apna des" from Pardes - does anyone remember this? It was really haunting, albeit the opening to that devastatingly annoying "London Dekha Paris Dekha..." song.
(4) The flute theme of Hero - brilliantly reinvented by Nasha.
(5) One word. Karz.
(6) The piano ballad of Kal Ho Naa Ho.
(7) Sukhwinder's "Sitaaron se aage jahaan bhi hai", from Dil Se, gave me chills.

And my absolute favorite, the Bombay theme. A song that made me feel that it was composed in another dimension, altogether. Truly makes you wonder what goes on inside the head of a genius like Rahman, to bring the notes and musical elements together to create such magic. Epic!

Soo Che, Mukeshbhai?

At $63.2 billion, Ambani Sr. has reportedly elbowed out Slim and Gates, just hours ago, to make him the "richest man in the world". Sounds ominous, as the market cap of the Mukesh Ambani Group crossed Rs. 5 trillion.

*UPDATED* Guess not, as Reliance came back with this quicky update to negate all such talk. Mr. Ambani is reportedly still pauperish in the region of ... (cough) ... $50 billion. Bah! Peasants. And I was thinking of flying him up to to my retreat at the Hamptons for a soiree, as my way of saying "welcome to the club".

But, with the Sensex kissing the 20K landmark, and the economy rise steady as a rock - its still worth asking, folks - What can brown do for you?

Hot Damn!

Waiting...

as if, in abeyance.

for a sign.
for a moment of repentance.
for salvation.
for the markets to prop back up.
for crisis to be a memory.
for the perfect bass-riff.
for the soothing strains of a violin.
for a vacation.
for a President with morals.
for fat-free Toblerone that tastes like Toblerone.
for an effortless book
for a meaningful film.
for Godot.
for ever.

Kailasa

Teri Deewani - Kailash Kher
Beyond those powerhouse vocals, the other element that really makes this a monumental song, are the octave harmonies on the "Tune kya kar daala, mar gayee main" and "Teri Deewani" lines.

Its time for a "sexy party"...




And Starbucks will call them "large" and "small"
Instead of pretentious crap like "grande" and "tall"

Ooh, classic!