Another Prick in the Wash

Yesterday I applied the theory of differential managerial economics to my 8 laundry loads. I am officially disgusted with myself on various levels.

Anywho, here's a rough sample of a basic script I came up with for a friend of mine who plans to work in the absolutely unique, untapped and non-competitive world of hedge fund consulting (please don't let the sarcasm go unnoticed). Credit to monsieur RK Santoshi for most of the original conceptualization.

In the office of WAH! WAH! Consulting

Mehmood-Like Interviewer: Wah! Kya resume hai! Thoo thoo thoo thoo
Friend: Sir, aap mere resume par kyon thook rahe hain!
Mehmood-Like Interviewer: Thook nahin! Nazar utar raha hoon. Taaki kisi aur consulting company ki ispe "nazar" naa lage.
Friend: abhi to main aa gaya hoon .. guru .. kardo na Wah Wah Consulting shuru!
Mehmood-Like Interviewer: Shuru Ho Gayee! Bajaj se baat bhi ho gayee. yeh lo. bajaj aa gaya.
Timepiece Bajaj: Nonsense! Tum log waqt se pehle kaise aa gaye? Har cheez time-to-time honi chahiye. Start.
Friend: Err. I have a lot of experience in ....
Timepiece Bajaj: Stop! Nonsense! Yeh resume par thook kyun hai?
Twin Bajaj Enters: MILGAYA! INVESTOR MILGAYA! Ab hum izzat se yeh consulting
company kholenge... hum log .. ek murgiyon ka mutual fund kholenge ...
Timepiece Bajaj: Nonsense!

Mehmood-like Interviewer: Dekho beta. Inki baaton mein mat aao. Tum ek aur intern ko apne consulting dreams ke jaal mein phasao .. jaise maine tumhe phasaaya hai ... (Friend raises eyebrows) ... banaaya hai ...

(Dream bubble emerges where Friend pictures himself selling the Murgiyon ka Mutual Fund idea to another friend)

Any takers?

The More Things Change, The More They Stay The Same

Something to think about, isn't it? Not just an ominous or profound thought to start me off today, but its true. Civilization may soon become the cause to upgrade us back to the stone age, because one part of me really feels that we are pushing things. Beyond the wondrous good that technology is doing for us, I sometimes feel like equating modern science to that little cartoon experimentalist who keeps mixing chemicals till they blow up in his face to leave a charred, hair-burnt and frazzled person, with a quizzical look in his eyes. Perhaps its because the world's supposedly most modern country has a leader who tells the country what it already knows in the most surprised, kiddish way possible - "Look what i discovered, America! Turns out we're dependent on oil!" - while his replacement filler is out accidentally shooting people.

(sigh) ... when will we ever learn? as Ghalib put it best ... "bazeecha-e-atfal hai duniya mere aage, hota hai shab-o-roz tamasha mere aage" ... i'd try and translate that, but I would never be able to convey it the way MG intended to.

Do check out my attempt at bringing the diverse worlds of dark ambient and Urdu ghazals together here.

Peace out, world.

Sometimes the simplest things in this world become the most complicated. Sometimes we fail to see what's under our very nose, and what's been there for so long ... gone unnoticed. Sometimes the things closest to you are not necessarily the most precious, and the things farthest from you are not necessarily the most insignificant .... and although its not in my nature to be mysterious ;-) .... i just feel like messing with you all ... :-)

Ryot of Color. Not just a play of words, but a resolved identity crisis. That's me. Connected with my roots and my simplistic heritage and identity. Beneath all the makebelieve, all the determination, all the want-to-bes and want-to-haves ... its time to connect with who I really am .... someone with simple needs but complicated derivatives .... with simple satisfactions but complex desires ... with simple passions but multi-dimensional ambitions .... truth is ... im truly a blot on the lifelong questmap ... a pawn in the never-ending, commercial-filled reality show of destiny ... im a ryot .... a ryot of color ....

its really difficult to explain where i'm coming from .... i do find a writer's block in trying to explain this thought .... it may sound like an absinthe-induced haze to most (and perhaps it is ... shhh) ... but its true ... its how i feel ... and i really can't deny it ...