Tuesday, February 28, 2006

Another Prick in the Wash

Yesterday I applied the theory of differential managerial economics to my 8 laundry loads. I am officially disgusted with myself on various levels.

Anywho, here's a rough sample of a basic script I came up with for a friend of mine who plans to work in the absolutely unique, untapped and non-competitive world of hedge fund consulting (please don't let the sarcasm go unnoticed). Credit to monsieur RK Santoshi for most of the original conceptualization.

In the office of WAH! WAH! Consulting

Mehmood-Like Interviewer: Wah! Kya resume hai! Thoo thoo thoo thoo
Friend: Sir, aap mere resume par kyon thook rahe hain!
Mehmood-Like Interviewer: Thook nahin! Nazar utar raha hoon. Taaki kisi aur consulting company ki ispe "nazar" naa lage.
Friend: abhi to main aa gaya hoon .. guru .. kardo na Wah Wah Consulting shuru!
Mehmood-Like Interviewer: Shuru Ho Gayee! Bajaj se baat bhi ho gayee. yeh lo. bajaj aa gaya.
Timepiece Bajaj: Nonsense! Tum log waqt se pehle kaise aa gaye? Har cheez time-to-time honi chahiye. Start.
Friend: Err. I have a lot of experience in ....
Timepiece Bajaj: Stop! Nonsense! Yeh resume par thook kyun hai?
Twin Bajaj Enters: MILGAYA! INVESTOR MILGAYA! Ab hum izzat se yeh consulting
company kholenge... hum log .. ek murgiyon ka mutual fund kholenge ...
Timepiece Bajaj: Nonsense!

Mehmood-like Interviewer: Dekho beta. Inki baaton mein mat aao. Tum ek aur intern ko apne consulting dreams ke jaal mein phasao .. jaise maine tumhe phasaaya hai ... (Friend raises eyebrows) ... banaaya hai ...

(Dream bubble emerges where Friend pictures himself selling the Murgiyon ka Mutual Fund idea to another friend)

Any takers?

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